Dates gone bad. Real bad.

I often wonder if I am the ONLY single lady in this world who absolutely despises the dating scene.  During my Jr. High and High school years, I was not interested in dating.  I have always been strong-willed, independent, and free spirited.  Dating someone at that time in my life was not something that I cared to do.  After graduating high school and moving to Charleston I thought the normal thing to do was test out the waters in the dating pool.

Ladies, let me give you a few tips through my experience of dating: 

DO NOT let one of your professors set you up on a blind date with their nephew.  If their uncle is known as the player, and the nephew shows some of those same qualities. Say NO!  As the saying goes, "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree."  

This one is a no brainier for most but if you are anything like the young me thinking you can change the world and everyone in it, you might have found yourself in this situation.  When a guy in your class singles you out among all the other girls and picks on you, it's not because he doesn't like you, it's because he DOES like you.  You would think that 18 and 19 years old, those games would stop but they don't.  Then when the day finally comes that he gets the nerve up to FINALLY ask you out on a date...JUST SAY NO!  Especially knowing that he is a KNOWN pothead.  You cannot change him.  He will most likely come to pick you up for your date high.  No joke.  It happens.

When you are in the gym getting your workout on and a guy approaches you.  Run.  Sure, it may be flattering that a guy would be interested in you when you look at your worse because let's face it, hair up in a messy bun, sweaty and no make-up is NOT attractive.  So feeling like you could conquer the world because you sparked someone's interest when you look like poo; you decide to give them your number.  Oh, let me add that you work at this gym so basically you just gave your personal number to a MEMBER.  You find out this guy is a pilot in the Air force and you know you can't turn down a man in uniform.  Especially someone who flies a plane.  It doesn't take long to make a date with this guy.  Then after finally coming back down to reality, you start thinking to yourself...well if he is already a pilot in the Air force that means he had to serve time first, then at least have 4 years of college behind him,you begin to wonder...how old is this guy?  So knowing that you are capable of looking him up in the system at the gym (because you do work there) you find out he is 30 years old!  For someone who had JUST turned 20...30 seem like a grandpa.  But you already said you would go on a date, so you do.  I am here to tell you...just because you agreed to do something does NOT mean you have to follow through.  That is what texting, Facebook or email is for.  You could get out of a date without ever having to speak to him again.  Long story short, you go out with him, you have the most awkward time of your life, he seems to think you are totally into him and ask you out for a second date.  Feeling bad for him and not having the courage to say no, you say yes and end up going out with him on 2 more dates!  You would think after turning him down from trying to kiss you 4 times over the past 3 dates he would get the hint.  Instead, he thinks it's time to move to the, "next level."  That is when you have a freak out moment in the middle of the restaurant and explain to him that he is just too old and you are not interested in him.  Of course you say it a bit nicer than that.  And his response is, "wow, I feel like you just stabbed me in the back."  You finish eating in awkward silence then leave the restaurant and have the LONGEST car ride home.  Ladies, do not let this be you.  I am trying to save you a lot of stress and anxiety.

Just when you think that you are so over dating, you meet a guy at church.  Ladies, JUST BECAUSE YOU MEET A GUY AT CHURCH DOES NOT MEAN ANYTHING!  After 3 weeks, he finally decides to ask you out.  You say no.  He is a persistent guy so the very next week he asks again.  Once again you say no but in the back of your mind you are hoping he will ask again.  Every girl likes to be pursued. Next week rolls around and he ask again.  You say no yet again.  He then says okay, why don't we just grab coffee?  As friends.  I will not come pick you up.  We will not call it a date.  We can meet at Starbucks and have a casual conversation.  You finally break down and agree to casual conversation and coffee with this guy.  So that day comes around and you go meet up with him for coffee and conversation...remember, it's not a date. You get your coffee, sit down and start talking.  The next thing you know, you look at your watch and realize 3 hours has past!  You are thinking, wow...this only felt like 30 minutes!  You go home that night, still on cloud 9.  You decide it's time to stalk his Facebook because any smart girl would check out a guy’s Facebook to find out more about him.  You start going through his pictures and come across wedding pictures.  Then all of a sudden, it finally dawns on you that you are looking at HIS wedding pictures that were only dated a year ago!!!  Your heart immediately sinks.  You grab your phone and without giving much thought, you send him a text saying, "You have a BEAUTIFUL bride! Loved your wedding pics on Facebook :)"  Ladies, if he is a charmer (which he was) RUN far far away!  It's the charmers that will suck you in!

All of you single ladies out there...if you have had similar issues in the dating world, you are NOT ALONE!  I understand.  These little blurbs of stories don't even tell half of what went on these dates!

Let me clarify, all of these dates were a couple of years ago if not more.  I have learned a thing or two about dating since then.  Maybe?

I am going to do a follow-up post on what I believe the dating world should look like as a Christian.  I thought I would give you a good laugh first  :)

All Glory, Honor Power is Yours

I went to write this very same post several days ago but I could not bring myself to publish it.  I wrote the post out of frustration and if I am going to be honest, I wrote the post out of anger.  I am so glad that I decided not to publish the original post.  I would have gotten my point across but it would not have been with an appropriate Christian attitude and certainly not with a loving heart.  It would have caused division within the church and that is not my goal and should not be anyone's goal who claims to be a Christian.  We ALL pull for the SAME team.  We ALL love the SAME God!  We ALL NEED God's love.  We are ALL in this Christian journey to let God use us to bring people to Him to better glorify His kingdom

This post is simply written out of concern for the church as a whole.  What sparked me to write a post as raw and honest as this is going to be is the "Code Orange Revival" that Elevation church in Charlotte felt led to do.  Let me start off by saying, I love Steven Furtick.  He is an amazing communicator, a captivating speaker, and he has a love for God that simply radiates off of him when he enters a room.  I had the privileged of hearing Steven Furtick when I was only 13. He was still in school, not married and he had spiky blonde hair.  (I don't think I could ever forget that hair!)  When my sister attended Winthrop University she attended Elevation Church.  When I would visit her, we went there for our Sunday morning worship.  It was an amazing experience and you could literally feel the Holy Spirit moving throughout that church.

With all that being said, there are a few concerns that I do have.  I keep up with Elevation Church and Steven Furtick through twitter.  During the 12 days of this revival, they were constantly tweeting about the amazing things that were going on during the revival.  There were a couple of tweets that really sat with me the wrong way.

Steven Furtick @stevenfurtick 

Download ALL sermons from #CodeOrangeRevival -OUR GIFT TO YOU! I

I absolutely love that Elevation is being kind enough to let everybody in the whole world to be able to download all the sermons, but what confuses me is that they say, "OUR GIFT TO YOU!" As easy as it is to take credit, we have to remember that all credit, glory and honor goes to our loving most awesome God.  It is God's gift to us that this revival took place.  He uses us, but God still gets all the praise and glory for this revival.

Steven Furtick @stevenfurtick

As w/ all our #CodeOrangeRevival experiences -there is NO CHARGE/NO TICKET for tonight's event-it's our gift to you.

I have never seen a church have to clarify that there is "NO CHARGE/NO TICKET for tonight's event."  To me it almost sounds as if we have to clarify that for this event tonight there is no charge.  Since when does a church have to advertise for a Free Church service?  The price for us to go to church, to worship openly and freely has already been paid.

Steven Furtick @stevenfurtick

“@ShannonMcgevna1: @stevenfurtick you have the most amazing staff, complete courtesy & respect #COR is changing my life”

I know that this staff is absolutely amazing.  I have no doubt in my mind that every single one of them is wonderful men and women of God.  The staff of a church can make a huge difference in the lives of the members.  One thing as staff we have to remember is that WE are not the one's changing lives of the people; it is God who is changing the lives.  Once again, we need to give all honor, praise and glory to God.  We would be nothing without Him.

As I have said, I love Steven Furtick and I think Elevation church is amazing.  I believe that this "Code orange revival" was a God inspired event that took place all over the world.  I believe that lives were changed.  I believe that relationships were restored.  I believe that God captured the heart of thousands during this revival.  We just need to remember who deserves all of the praise and glory for this revival.  We are nothing without Him.  We cannot do anything without Him.

"You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being." Revelations 4:11

Feb. 15, 2011. The day I will never forget

I wrote this note on my Facebook last year before I started blogging. This explains where the poem that I wrote came from.

Writing is what I normally do to express myself, but I generally do so in a little journal that I keep hidden in my room instead of publically posting on the internet. For this subject matter, I feel the need to do it publically.

As many know, Agrium Fertilizer plant burned down in Hartsville just a few hours ago. I grew up with having that plant as a big part of my life because my Dad has been employed there as assistant plant manager and then became plant manager for 29 years. I remember as a little girl sitting in his office sometimes pretending like I was working right alongside of him. When I got the call from my mom telling me the plant is on fire, I immediately got in my car and came home to Hartsville. It had to be the longest ride of my life. My heart aches as I watch my Dad stand there helplessly and watch it burn to the ground. Thankfully, no one was injured in this tragic fire. There are around 50 people who are employed at the plant. It is a true miracle no one was hurt.

I can't help but wonder why this happened. My heart goes out to the families that are affected by this as well as the community of Hartsville which will be affected.

I'm not sure what the future holds for my family. Hartsville is where I was born and raised and the thought of my family having to relocate is heart-breaking for me. I used to not be able to wait to get out of this town...but that thought has been changing over the past few months. This devastating tragedy really opened my eyes to how much I truly love my home town. I know that God has a plan and a purpose for my family. I leave it in his hands.

I pray for my Dad.

I pray for my family.

I pray for the employees and their families.

I pray for the community.

I pray for the company as a whole.

Proverbs 3:5-6

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your

Own understanding;

In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight"

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."

Never will I Forget that Day

How did this happen? How did it start?
It only took one spark and I felt as if my world fell apart.
The sight was so unbearable and yet I couldn't help but stand there and watch.
Feelings of loss. Feelings of anger. Feelings of heartache.

All I have known is engulfed in flames.
The place that I call home seems like it has gone to shame.
Questions go through my head...what happens now? What happens next?
My parents did their best to comfort me, but those same questions lingered in their minds and sent them in a complex.

Now what do we do? We wait. We wait for what it seems like forever.
Waiting on answers for our next endeavor.
During the wait I pray. I pray for strength. I pray for guidance. I pray for comfort.
I pray all these things knowing that my God will come through with answers.

The time has come. My prayers were answered.
But the feelings of loss, anger and heartache still spread within me like cancer.
Mixed emotions were in full swing.
The answers to my prayers almost felt like a sting.

For the past 22 years, all I have ever known comes to an abrupt stop.
My family is moving. What do I do now? My life has now turned into a spinning top.
I put on a face of joy even though deep inside I struggle with anger and doubt.
My life took another turn and I all I want to do it block it out.

One thing I am sure of is that God is always faithful.
No matter how I feel, I am still grateful.
I continue to pray for understanding, guidance and peace
For I know that God has a perfect plan for me and His love will never cease.

As my family moves into the next season of their lives
I know that God will stay by our side.
I still have question that run through my head. What do I do now? What should I do next?
I still feel as if my life is falling apart, I wish that God could write it out in a text.

One thing I have to remember is that this is not my life that I am living for.
I am living this life for a man named Jesus. The one that I adore.
My life may seem as it is falling apart, but He is there to pick up the pieces.
I could not get through this without Him. Day by day, my love for Him increases.

I wish that I could turn "wish" in the whole paragraph into "know."

I often get inspired by articles that I have read, books, conversations, my quiet time, poetry, songs, and paintings. 

I came across this video that I just had to share.  It describes how I feel perfectly.

Imagine what our would would be like if we were "coloredblind but not colorless"?  I wish we could all see the beauty in each and every race.  I wish we could look past the color of people's skin and see Jesus in them instead.  I wish we could appreciate the different cultures.  I wish people could see that we are ALL "just people" who NEEDS God's grace.  I wish that people did not have the hatred in their heart towards people who do not look like them.  I wish that people would understand that we are ALL made in the image of our PERFECT Creator.  Even though segregation supposevly does not exist, I wish that I could walk into the high school lunch room and not see segrated tables and groups of people.  I wish that Sunday was not the most segrated day of the week.  I wish that we were all "coloredblind but not colorless." 

I wish that I could turn "wish" in the whole paragraph into the word "know."